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Sex

 

Fornication

Fornication is like a cats paw. When lightly stroked, it is quite soft and pleasurable, but increased pressure brings out the claws of sin that will shred you very life. ── Michael P. GreenIllustrations for Biblical Preaching

 

Adultery

Returning from Sunday school, where the Ten Commandments had been the topic of the day, a young boy asked his father, “Daddy, what does it mean when it says, ‘Thou shalt not commit agriculture?’” There was hardly a beat between the question and the father’s reply: “Son, that just means that you’re not supposed to plow the other man’s field,” an answer satisfactory to both of them. ── Michael P. GreenIllustrations for Biblical Preaching

 

Homosexuality

New York - The Empire State Building will go lavender for three days.  The skyscraper will be doused in lavender light June 22-24 for the annual Gay and Lesbian Pride March.  Lavender symbolizes the gay movement.  Colored lights have been used to illuminate the 59-year-old building for Valentine's Day, St. Patrick's Day, and the Fourth of July.  But for years the management of the 102-story building has rejected lighting requests by groups representing homosexuals.  Now there's a change of heart in response to Mayor David Dinkins' plea to end discrimination.  About 700,000 homosexuals live in the city.  About 200,000 people will take part in the march.  Karin Schwartz of the Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation calls the lighting "a moving symbol of our

pride." -- By Bruce Frankel, USA TODAY  6-7-90

 

Homosexuality

Seattle (Reuter) - An organization of rabbis representing the largest and most liberal wing of American Judaism has adopted a policy admitting openly homosexual men and women to its clergy.  A policy-making report on homosexuality and the rabbinate was approved overwhelmingly yesterday by voice vote at the annual meeting here of the Central Conference of American Rabbis.  The vote marks the first time a large Judeo-Christian religious body has admitted homosexuals to its clergy.  The report, by a 17-member ad hoc committee, endorsed the religious equality of Jews regardless of sexual orientation.  However, it emphasized that the ideal human relationship was "heterosexual, monogamous, procreative marriage" and it stopped short of rendering homosexual relationships as "religiously valid" as heterosexual ones.  The reform movement, the largest branch of Judaism in the United States, has an estimated 1.3 million members. -- Associated Press  6-26-90

 

Masturbation

   For me the real evil of masturbation would be that is takes an appetite which, in lawful use, leads an individual out of himself to complete (and correct) his own personality in that of another (and finally in children and even grandchildren) and turns it back; sends the man back into the prison of himself, there to keep a harem of imaginary brides. And his harem, once admitted, works against his ever getting out and really uniting with a real woman.—C.S. Lewis

 

Sex

Sex is like fire. In a fireplace, its warm and delightful. Outside the hearth, its destructive and uncontrollable. ── Michael P. GreenIllustrations for Biblical Preaching

 

Sex

You can usually get a large audience together to watch a striptease. There is no question about it, a lot of people would come to watch a woman undress on the stage, thus indulging and misusing their sexual appetites.

Now suppose you visited a country where an auditorium is packed to the walls with people watching, not a girl undressing, but a guy walking out with big tray covered with a veil. Then music begins to play, lights begin to flash, and all of a sudden, after some rather enticing maneuvers, the veil is lifted and there on the tray is an orange. Next, in a teasing way, the fellow begins to peel the orange while that crowd goes wild! Wouldnt you think that in this country something had gone wrong with the peoples appetite for food?

The Bible clearly speaks regarding the proper use of the body. In 1 Corinthians 6:13, Paul says, The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord (NIV). And yet, what happens in our society? The body is distorted to the place of perversion! ── Michael P. GreenIllustrations for Biblical Preaching

 

Sex

A wealthy couple desired to employ a chauffeur. The lady of the house advertised, the applicants were screened, and four suitable candidates were brought before her for the final selection. She called the prospective chauffeurs to her balcony and pointed out a brick wall alongside the driveway. Then she asked the men, How close do you think you could come to that wall without scratching my car?

The first man felt that he could drive within a foot of the wall without damaging the car. The second felt sure that he could come within six inches. The third believed that he could get within three inches. The fourth candidate said, I do not know how close I could come to the wall without damaging your car. Instead, I would try to stay as far away from that wall as I could. This candidate had a different focus. He understood that true skill in driving is not based so much on the ability to steer the car to a narrow miss as on the ability to keep a wide margin of safety.

Like the fourth candidate, there are many aspects of human nature, such as sexual temptation, that are best dealt with by keeping a wide margin of safety. When we decide what to do in a doubtful area, such as going to a particular movie, we should be as wise as that man. ── Michael P. GreenIllustrations for Biblical Preaching

 

Sex

   Sexual intercourse outside of marriage is always wrong. Why? Because those who indulge in it are trying to isolate one aspect of union-the physical-from all the other aspects that were intended to make a total union of two people. There is nothing wrong with sexual pleasure, any more than there is with the pleasure of eating. However, just as attempting to enjoy the pleasures of eating and tasting without swallowing and digesting is abhorrent and wrong, so attempting to enjoy sex as an isolated physical sensation is wrong.

 

Sex

   Christians should view sex with reverence. Therefore, they should not joke about it. Just as all Christians view communion with reverence and thus never joke about it, in like manner is sex considered sacred-and to joke about it is a form of profanity.

 

Virgins

In a world searching for the latest and best ways to have sex, virginity has become an embarrassment.  This is to be expected in a society that preaches pleasure, but not in the church where virtue is assumed but not taught.  After all, people reason, what is there to write about abstaining?  Sex is seen as a fulfillment; virginity, as a vacuum.  But it had better be more than that, especially for us single women who outnumber marriageable men by 7.3 million in the U.S. and most of the available ones are not in the church.  So unless we disobey God outright by marrying a non-Christian, let's face it:  many of us will never marry.  Well-meaning friends tell us to believe God for a mate.  But God doesn't promise us that we will ever marry.  He promises us Himself. -- Julia Duin, Homemade - February, 1990

 

ADULTERY

Long ago Demosthenes had written: "We keep prostitutes for pleasure; we keep mistresses for the day to day needs of the body; we keep wives for the begetting of children and for the faithful guardianship of our homes. So long as a man supported his wife and family there was no shame whatsoever in extra- marital affairs." ── C. Swindoll, Sanctity of Life,  Word, 1990, p. 62.

I am steadfastly for monogamy. Adultery is almost certainly going to make a dent in trust and intimacy, and in many cases I've known, it has destroyed them altogether. A woman who is conducting a secret affair has to become deliberately deceitful...like a CIA agent or spy. She can't just come home and spill forth the events of her day. She's got to think, What can I safely talk about, and what have I got to keep to myself? So even when the infidelity isn't discovered, it changes who you are. A person goes from being a candid, open human being to a secretive, hidden one. ── Bernie Zilbergeld, Homemade, November, 1989.

Hite of Folly. Sensationalistic sex surveys suffered further damage with the release of new research on the fidelity of American spouses. According to a new study by Tom W. Smith of the National Opinion Research Center, roughly 15 percent of married or previously married Americans have committed adultery. The results largely agree with the 1987 ABC News/Washington Post poll that found 89 percent of spouses faithful. Pop culture gurus Kinsey (37 percent of men), Joyce Brothers (50 percent of women), and Shire Hite (75 percent of women married 5 years) have stoked reports of rampant infidelity. ── Family Research Council, Washington Watch, October 29, 1993, p. 2.

The sexual revolution notwithstanding, nearly all married couples are monogamous, two new sex surveys say. A university of Washington, Seattle, study in October's American Journal of Public Health found 94 percent of married couples had one partner in the previous year. Likewise, a survey by the National Opinion Research Center in Chicago determined that only about 4 percent of married people had sexual partners other than their spouse during a one-year span. Overall, infidelity has been practiced by only 21 percent of men and 13 percent of women, according to the survey. The studies dispute data by such investigators as the Kinsey Institute of Sex Research and author Shere Hite, who have suggested anywhere from one-third to three-fourths of married couples cheat on their mates. "There probably are more scientifically worthless 'facts' on extramarital relations than any other facet of human behavior," says Tom W. Smith of the National Opinion Research Center. Smith says adultery is more prevalent among younger people, urban dwellers, and unchurched, and the previously divorced.── Christianity Today, November 22, 1993, p. 42.

A large majority of men--married and single--say they wouldn't have an affair, even if they were certain their loved one would never find out, says a Gallup poll commissioned by Self magazine, in the June (1992) issue. Of 500 men surveyed, 67% of married men and 60% of unmarried men say an affair is absolutely out of the question. Only 5% of married men and 11% of unmarried men would do it (the rest said maybe). Also, 95% of married men say they wouldn't drop their partner for a trophy wife if they became extremely successful or wealthy. ── U.S.A. Today, May 26, 1992, p. D1.

The major factor contributing to extramarital relationships is physical and emotional attraction (78 percent), far outdistancing marital dissatisfaction (41 percent).─ How Common is Pastoral Indiscretion?, Leadership, Winter, 1988, p. 12-13.

It was reported today (7-24-90) in the news that former PTL leader and TV evangelist Jim Bakker, now jailed for various fund- raising improprieties, makes eleven cents an hour cleaning toilets in the penitentiary. And a federal judge ruled that the little money he has accumulated could be seized to pay penalties he owes of over $500,000. His empire crumbled when he had an adulterous relationship with Jessica Hahn. ── David Hocking, The Moral Catastrophe, Harvest House, 1990, p. 64ff.

There is a direct correlation between age at loss of virginity and having an affair later in life. In women who have their first sexual relationship at age 21, or later, cheating occurs with only 16%. But for those who have their first sexual relationship at a younger age, up to 50% cheat on a future mate. ── Homemade, Vol. 10, No. 7, quoted from Female Sexuality.

Dr. Donald Granvold, a professor at the Univ. of Texas at Arlington, surveyed 262 marriage counselors. 22% thought marriages are jeopardized when the wife has an affair, while only 2% thought marriages are in trouble when the husband has an affair. 40% of the counselors he surveyed admitted that they themselves had had extramarital experiences. (1985)── Dr. Donald Granvold.

 

     持守貞潔的要義不在壓抑情慾,而在於徹底把一己的生命指向一個目標。―― 潘霍華

 

Fornication

            Vice is a monster of such terrible mien

            That to be hated needs but to be seen.

            Yet seen too often, familiar her face

            We first endure, then sanction, then embrace.

── Michael P. GreenIllustrations for Biblical Preaching

 

Masturbation

For me the real evil of masturbation would be that is takes an appetite which, in lawful use, leads an individual out of himself to complete (and correct) his own personality in that of another (and finally in children and even grandchildren) and turns it back; sends the man back into the prison of himself, there to keep a harem of imaginary brides. And his harem, once admitted, works against his ever getting out and really uniting with a real woman. C.S. Lewis

 

Sex

Sexual intercourse outside of marriage is always wrong. Why? Because those who indulge in it are trying to isolate one aspect of union-the physical-from all the other aspects that were intended to make a total union of two people. There is nothing wrong with sexual pleasure, any more than there is with the pleasure of eating. However, just as attempting to enjoy the pleasures of eating and tasting without swallowing and digesting is abhorrent and wrong, so attempting to enjoy sex as an isolated physical sensation is wrong. ── Michael P. GreenIllustrations for Biblical Preaching

 

Sex

Christians should view sex with reverence. Therefore, they should not joke about it. Just as all Christians view communion with reverence and thus never joke about it, in like manner is sex considered sacred-and to joke about it is a form of profanity. ── Michael P. GreenIllustrations for Biblical Preaching

 

HOMOSEXUALITY

The average age of a homosexual man dying with AIDS is 39. The average age of gays dying of all other causes is 41. (The average heterosexual married man lives 75 years.) Only one percent of men who practice homosexual sex lives to be 65 or older. Gay men are three times more likely to have alcohol or drug abuse problems. Homosexuals are 14 times more likely to have had syphilis, and 23 times more likely to contract venereal diseases. 

From a 1993 report by the Family Research Institute.


It's out, and it's hot: a discussion guide on sexuality for Lutherans. Released last month, it is sure to spark debate both in and out of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America (ELCA) between now and the next ELCA assembly in 1993. "Human Sexuality and the Christian Faith," a 55 page document produced by the denomination's Division for Church and Society, was designed to prompt dialogue and set the stage for a future ELCA social statement on sex issues. The material urges readers to examine with an open mind different views about marriage, promiscuity, and homosexuality.

At it's core the document questions biblical passages concerning homosexuality and suggests that scriptural references to same-sex relationships need to be re-interpreted in light of modern theories about sexual orientation. "We must distinguish between moral judgments regarding same-sex activity in biblical times and in our own time," the report states. It differentiates "exploitative" homosexual activity from same-sex relationships" in which there is mutual love and commitment." The document challenges ELCA members to evaluate prejudices against homosexuals, insisting that "what we personally find offensive is not necessarily sinful."

Members of a 24 person United Methodist Church (UMC) panel could not agree on whether homosexuality is a sin, so the committee's 14,000-word report on the subject was referred to the denomination's national policy-making body, which will convene in Louisville, Ky., in May. The report contains a majority statement, signed by 17 committee members, recommending the removal of an assertion in the church's book of rules that homosexual practice and Christianity are incompatible. A minority report, signed by four members, argues for retaining the current language. The panel agreed that biblical references to sexual practices should not be viewed as binding "just because they are in the Bible." Fierce debate is expected at this year's General Conference because at least 35 of the UMC's 72 regional bodies have approved resolutions calling for preserving the traditional stance.

Copyright 1992 by Media Management, P.O. Box 21433, Roanoke,VA.


The oft-reported claims that Americans are promiscuous and that 10 percent are exclusively homosexual are false, according to a new University of Chicago study. Sociologist Tom W. Smith of the University of Chicago National Opinion Research Corporation (NORC) says his study clearly shows the vast majority of Americans are heterosexual and unlikely to engage in behavior that would put them at risk for AIDS. The study shows 93 percent of the population has been exclusively heterosexual since the age of 18. Five to 6 percent consider themselves bisexual. And only 1 percent are exclusively homosexual. Smith also found that only 6.8 percent of the population engaged in sexual activity of any kind that would put them at risk of AIDS. 

Citizen, Vol. 4, No. 4, April 1990, p. 5.

 

SEX

A three-year-old boy went with his dad to see a new litter of kittens. On returning home, he breathlessly informed his mother, "There were two boy kittens and two girl kittens."
"How did you know that?" his mother asked.
"Daddy picked them up and looked underneath," he replied. "I think it's printed on the bottom."

Pearl Scully in The Saturday Evening Post.


We can supplement our accountability to others by reading slowly through literature designed to challenge our Christian maturity. Consider, as an example, these questions related to sexual purity that I had to read carefully as I read Kent Hughes' Liberating Ministry from the Success Syndrome:

1. Are we being desensitized by the present evil world? Do things that once shocked us now pass us by with little notice? Have our sexual ethics slackened?
2. Where do our minds wander when we have no duties to perform?
3. What are we reading? Are there books or magazines or files in our libraries that we want no one else to see?
4. What are we renting at the local video stores? How many hours do we spend watching TV? How many adulteries did we watch last week? How many murders? How many did we watch with our children?
5. How many chapters of the Bible did we read last week?

Leading the Way by Paul Borthwick, Navpress, 1989, pp. 120-121.


A little boy asked his mother where he came from, and also where she had come from as a baby. His mother gave him a tall tale about a beautiful white-feathered bird. The boy asked his grandmother the same question and received a variation on the bird story. Outside to his playmate he said, "You know, there hasn't been a normal birth in our family for three generations."

Howard Hendricks, quoted in Homemade, September, 1989.


Statistics and Research

Teen facts. Since the popular push for contraceptives for teens began, teenage sexual activity and pregnancy have increased 400%. 70% of unwed teen mothers will go on welfare. Of teens who marry because of pregnancy, 60% will be divorced in five years.

Josh McDowell, Family Happiness is Homemade, Vol. 14, No. 6, June 1990.


A study at a Midwestern school showed that 80% of the women who had intercourse hoped to marry their partner. Only 12% of the men had the same expectation

Robert J. Collins in the Chicago Tribune, quoted in HIS, February, 1976.


Sex is not the most important part of a love relationship. A Syracuse University survey asked married couples to rank the 10 most important things in a marriage relationship. Caring, a sense of humor and communication came in first, second and third. Sex came in ninth, just ahead of sharing household duties.

Dr. Thomas Lickona.

SEXUAL PURITY

A beautiful blond senior shares: "When we date, we start giving gifts, like flowers or candy. When a couple becomes engaged, they give special things--a diamond and very personal things. The most personal gift that I can ever give is myself. I have nothing more precious to give. When I marry, I want to give my husband the best that I have--my whole self as completely as I can."

Dr. Richard B. Wilke, in Homemade, October, 1989.

SEX, attitudes about

According to a Roper Organization poll, only 49% of American women believe sex before marriage is immoral, down from 65% who believed that in 1970. About half also indicated that there is no reason a single woman should not be able to have children and raise them on their own--though only 15% said such behavior would be acceptable for their own daughters.

Roper Organization Poll.

SEX, premarital

Sometimes when I'm talking to teens, I draw an analogy between the bonding capacity of the body and adhesive tape. Adhesive tape is not made for repetitive use. The strongest bond adhesive tape is capable of making is formed with the first surface to which it is applied. You can remove the tape and reapply it to other surfaces several times, and it will still adhere. However, with every application, some of the adhesiveness has been compromised. Finally, if you continue the practice long enough, there will not be enough adhesiveness left to make the tape stick to any surface. God intended that the bond between mates be the closest and strongest one they are capable of forming. That is why Paul makes it very clear that the body is not for fornication.

Dr. Richard Dobbins, Homemade, November. 1987.


Research and Statistics

The Journal of Marriage and Family reported that couples who live together before marriage are less satisfied with their marriages and more likely to split up during rocky times.

Focus on the Family, Nov. 1986, p. 11.

SEX, teen

Since the popular push for contraceptives for teens began, teenage sexual activity and pregnancy have increased almost 400%. 70% of unwed teen mothers will go on welfare. Of teens who marry because of pregnancy, 60% will be divorced in five years.

Josh McDowell, in Homemade, June, 1990.